Parentingyour teenager: dont buy the i dont know and i dont care line - parenting
"I don't know and I don't care. "
I've heard those words more than a few times in my office. From time to time I think "I don't know and I don't care" is the entire teen ancestral motto.
So what to do?
I consider operational with one kid who said completely naught in the first meeting but "I don't know and I don't care" at least 10 times each.
So just beforehand he came for his next session, I wrote "I don't know" on one side of a sheet of paper and "I don't care" on the other side. I then taped the piece of paper to the couch I brain wave he was most possible to sit on.
In comes the kid, cracks up laughing, tapes the paper to his shirt, and then begins to talk for the rest of the meeting.
3 Keys for How to Respond
I tell you the above story as it offers three keys on how to answer back to "I don't know and I don't care. "
1) Don't buy into what they are saying. It's just a way to try to get you to back off, and/or to see if you care a sufficient amount to pursue them.
2) You easily must keep your sense of humor. Get hooked and get angry and you are dead in the water.
3) Do amazing assorted or unexpected. As parents we can befall predictable.
If I can get parents to counter in ways that put a baffled look on the face of a teen, I know we are being paid somewhere.
A Fun Response
The next time you hear the words "I don't know" answer back this way:
"Well, you know what, at your age it's OK not to know a whole lot. But if you did know, what would it be?"
I use this in my bureau all the time. Nine out of 10 times, the kid will key and start talking.
One time out of 10 times a teen will act in response with
"You are just asking the same ask in a another way. "
To which I respond
"You know what, you are right! And you have also just shown me how very cheerful you are, so quit in performance dumb and come back with the question. "
In the face of the common teen motto, remember:
Don't buy it, keep your sense of humor and don't get hooked.
Respond innovatively and differently.
Visit ParentingYourTeenager. com to subscribe to Jeff Herring's free internet newsletter "Parenting Your Teenager" and the free 5 day e-program on the "5 Equipment to Avoid Maxim to Your Teenager. "
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